Turns out there IS an app for LJ... However I can not view my friends page... And that is really stupid
Posted via LiveJournal.app.
March 13th, 2009
September 10th, 2008
I thought it was a good idea to get a blog ... where I blog about things not personal. just thoughts ... ideas... news ... my opnions on such.
its rather fun.
http://winkypetals.wordpress.com/
November 15th, 2007
book - wicked by gregory maguire [I just finished it today ... OMG ITS AMAZING!]
CD- relient k - five score and seven years ago [saw them in concert last night ... it makes me warm]
:)
CD- relient k - five score and seven years ago [saw them in concert last night ... it makes me warm]
:)
February 25th, 2006
January 30th, 2006
gigglyJanuary 23rd, 2006
| You Belong in London |
 A little old fashioned, and a little modern. A little traditional, and a little bit punk rock. A unique woman like you needs a city that offers everything. No wonder you and London will get along so well. |
| You are Milk Chocolate |
 A total dreamer, you spend most of your time with your head in the clouds. You often think of the future, and you are always working toward your ideal life. Also nostelgic, you rarely forget a meaningful moment... even those from long ago. |
January 16th, 2006
we are 16 days into what seems like the best year ever.
peacefulDecember 21st, 2005
I'm having a serious issue.
everyone knows I love my major. e-media is my life. I adore DJing and I'm hella good at it. I love producing and writing for commericals and things, and I'm hella good at it. If there is one thing I have confidence and power in, its what I do.
my whole life I've wanted fame, fortune, to get paid to make people laugh and smile and think I'm beautiful.
but theres another side to me ... hugly different side to me.
I want to go pre-med. I'm having a hard time deciding this. I adore what I do, but it doesn't really benefit anyone. its fun and its easy. thats the story of my life, when things get hard, bail. run like hell and never look back. like with school work, I do as least as I can ... I've never be able to sit down and DO IT.
thats what holds me back ... see ... if I went pre-med it would make my mother proud ... she would brag to the world her daughter was going to be a doctor. but what if things got too hard and I bailed?
I'm not saying e-media is easy but its not pre-med hard either. I'm horriable at math ... I've never even taken physics. yes, it scares me. failing scares me. I don't know how to buckle down.
I want to learn, but how do you just learn that?
its really hard for me to decide something SO HUGE.
I thought og going to the recording studio for 8 weeks get my degree and be a dj while in college. my job to get me through hell would be like a leisure activity. right?
I'm scared to take that step. I'm lazy. I don't want to disappoint everyone.
frankly I'm scared being lazy has killed my potiental to do anything except my shallow excuses for dreams.
everyone knows I love my major. e-media is my life. I adore DJing and I'm hella good at it. I love producing and writing for commericals and things, and I'm hella good at it. If there is one thing I have confidence and power in, its what I do.
my whole life I've wanted fame, fortune, to get paid to make people laugh and smile and think I'm beautiful.
but theres another side to me ... hugly different side to me.
I want to go pre-med. I'm having a hard time deciding this. I adore what I do, but it doesn't really benefit anyone. its fun and its easy. thats the story of my life, when things get hard, bail. run like hell and never look back. like with school work, I do as least as I can ... I've never be able to sit down and DO IT.
thats what holds me back ... see ... if I went pre-med it would make my mother proud ... she would brag to the world her daughter was going to be a doctor. but what if things got too hard and I bailed?
I'm not saying e-media is easy but its not pre-med hard either. I'm horriable at math ... I've never even taken physics. yes, it scares me. failing scares me. I don't know how to buckle down.
I want to learn, but how do you just learn that?
its really hard for me to decide something SO HUGE.
I thought og going to the recording studio for 8 weeks get my degree and be a dj while in college. my job to get me through hell would be like a leisure activity. right?
I'm scared to take that step. I'm lazy. I don't want to disappoint everyone.
frankly I'm scared being lazy has killed my potiental to do anything except my shallow excuses for dreams.
confusedDecember 16th, 2005
well, I made my mom come with me to the ear specalist today. but I mean, can you blame me?
basically, I punctured my ear drum, and the hole is infected and there is a blood clot on it. all of this isn't exactly good. I have a zillion ear drop 50 million times a day, and if I don'tt ake advil every few hours, the pain gets so intense I lay and cry. I have to go back in a week to make sure its healing right and to check on the blood clot.
this sucks so bad. loud noises hurt, I get really tired after short periods of time, i get moody becuase it hurts so bad. I have a 10 hour shift tomorrow and I think I might die.
I did get my hair cut though. I have that shorter piece by my face you know ... well I just it shorter ... its almost long brushed off to the side bangs. reguardless I think it adds a level of maturity to me and I like it alot.
I'm so not into chrismtas this year. I wish I was. this is the first year in 5 years I have no gift to buy a boy. it really bothers me. I mean, I went 15 years alone, then I have either had a bf or a romantic interst since ... and nothing. going from having somehting to not it harder than never having anyone and never knowing what thats like.
but its like ruined it for everyone. I haven't bought any gifts for anyone and christmas is a week away. I haven't even bought christmas cards.
its really pathetic and now having a busted ear drum I think its going to make me care about it even more.
maybe the ghost of christmas will come smack me in the face.
irritatedDecember 14th, 2005
I busted my ear drum.
it hurts.
alot.
:(
dan made me go home from work early
because I hurt.
alot.
I have to go to a specialist tomorrow
because when your ear is bleeding
and your ear drum is busted
its vital.
alot.
it hurts.
alot.
:(
dan made me go home from work early
because I hurt.
alot.
I have to go to a specialist tomorrow
because when your ear is bleeding
and your ear drum is busted
its vital.
alot.
lethargicDecember 13th, 2005
no more 15 icons for me, I missed having the chance to have 100 [and missed the 50 I had] so ... its back and I'm happy ... I can go icon happy again!
now, cna anyone help me with my banner? I love my layout, I just want to change my banner. I love my valo, but, I need a change.
<3
now, cna anyone help me with my banner? I love my layout, I just want to change my banner. I love my valo, but, I need a change.
<3
| Your 2005 Song Is |
 Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day "My shadow's the only one that walks beside me My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating" In 2005, you bummed everyone out. Like you care. |
I ate yummy soup!December 10th, 2005
I've been going to bed SO early lately. its fantastic, because I wake up early in the morning. I've been up for almost 2 hours now. its a wonderful feeling.
anyway, lots of snow everywhere. I'm cold. so, I'm wearing my ugggg - ly boots. god knows I hate these stupid tings, but they are so comfy ... sigh. oh well, no one looks at my feet anyway. unless of course, they do.
so, I don't know why I ever stopped listening to john reuben, he makes my soul happy. I need to buy his new[er] cd. makes me feel good.
I really am just updating becuase I never ever do. I will update a good one tonight [probably friends only, which means it will be good.]
but I have to go to work now.
<3
anyway, lots of snow everywhere. I'm cold. so, I'm wearing my ugggg - ly boots. god knows I hate these stupid tings, but they are so comfy ... sigh. oh well, no one looks at my feet anyway. unless of course, they do.
so, I don't know why I ever stopped listening to john reuben, he makes my soul happy. I need to buy his new[er] cd. makes me feel good.
I really am just updating becuase I never ever do. I will update a good one tonight [probably friends only, which means it will be good.]
but I have to go to work now.
<3
goodDecember 7th, 2005
What kind of eyes do you have? (with pictures)
Eden
You have eden eyes. Eden is the color of water. Your eyes symbolize your great flexibility. You are a creative person. You can think of many good ways to get your point across to people as you have very good communication abilities. When someone feels down or is hurt, you have the remarkable ability to help them and heal them. If you have too little going on in your life, you may be withdrawn and depressed, timid, manipulative, unreliable, stubborn, or suspicious. Some words to describe you: peaceful, sincere, affectionate, tranquil, intuitive, trustworthy, pure, loyal, healing, and stable.
Quizzes by myYearbook.com -- the World's Biggest Yearbook!
calmI don't belong here
I never saw this on the path I walk
The blood-stained walls, the lines of chalk on the floor
Its getting so hard
I never saw the backlash, when the tide began to rise
I can't remember
The way it was when everything felt right
My mouth held shut and eyes sealed tight with control
Pre-Chorus:
So I remember on the inside
Chorus:
I found a dark, infernal place, I don't wanna face anymore
Somehow I won't stop feeding the pain
My heart's just the same as before
So now I'm stuck here
Between the guilty and the insincere
The words I've spoke have left me here all alone
I should have known this
I never saw the backlash, when the tide began to rise
I wish it all gone
I could've burned it when I had the choice
And now I'd die to kill this noise in my head
Pre-Chorus:
Chorus:
If this is all the love my spirit can give
Just take it back tonight
There is not a reason more to live
I never saw this on the path I walk
The blood-stained walls, the lines of chalk on the floor
Its getting so hard
I never saw the backlash, when the tide began to rise
I can't remember
The way it was when everything felt right
My mouth held shut and eyes sealed tight with control
Pre-Chorus:
So I remember on the inside
Chorus:
I found a dark, infernal place, I don't wanna face anymore
Somehow I won't stop feeding the pain
My heart's just the same as before
So now I'm stuck here
Between the guilty and the insincere
The words I've spoke have left me here all alone
I should have known this
I never saw the backlash, when the tide began to rise
I wish it all gone
I could've burned it when I had the choice
And now I'd die to kill this noise in my head
Pre-Chorus:
Chorus:
If this is all the love my spirit can give
Just take it back tonight
There is not a reason more to live
discontentDecember 2nd, 2005
November 29th, 2005
I wrote a sonnet. you didn't even know its for you. I wrote you a poem. You thought I could write better. I gave you my heart. you didn't know you had it. I gave you my soul, you gave it back black and blue. I shed a million tears, you didn't know they were all for you. you've pushed me away ... and I can finally say, fuck you.
but my heart came back ... missing a piece. one piece that will always make me never mean the terriable words I will ever say to you. please let me go.
dear "ned",
you ran away from my heart, so I changed the lock.you are not welcome back. back in my dreams, back in my words, back in my thoughts, back in my life. I loved you once, and I can not do it again. every word we speak ... you don't know what it does to me.
forever yours,
the girl you didn't even know existed.
but my heart came back ... missing a piece. one piece that will always make me never mean the terriable words I will ever say to you. please let me go.
dear "ned",
you ran away from my heart, so I changed the lock.you are not welcome back. back in my dreams, back in my words, back in my thoughts, back in my life. I loved you once, and I can not do it again. every word we speak ... you don't know what it does to me.
forever yours,
the girl you didn't even know existed.
blankNovember 26th, 2005
I’ve got another confession to make
I’m your fool
Everyone’s got their chains to break
Holdin’ you
Were you born to resist or be abused?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Are you gone and onto someone new?
I needed somewhere to hang my head
Without your noose
You gave me something that I didn’t have
But had no use
I was too weak to give in
Too strong to lose
My heart is under arrest again
But I break loose
My head is giving me life or death
But I can’t choose
I swear I’ll never give in
I refuse
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
Your trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Oh...
Ohhhhhh
Ohhhhhh
Ohhhhhh
Ohh
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
The life, the love
You die to heal
The hope that starts
The broken hearts
Your trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
I’ve got another confession my friend
I’m no fool
I’m getting tired of starting again
Somewhere new
Were you born to resist or be abused?
I swear I’ll never give in
I refuse
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
Your trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Oh...
I’m your fool
Everyone’s got their chains to break
Holdin’ you
Were you born to resist or be abused?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Are you gone and onto someone new?
I needed somewhere to hang my head
Without your noose
You gave me something that I didn’t have
But had no use
I was too weak to give in
Too strong to lose
My heart is under arrest again
But I break loose
My head is giving me life or death
But I can’t choose
I swear I’ll never give in
I refuse
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
Your trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Oh...
Ohhhhhh
Ohhhhhh
Ohhhhhh
Ohh
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
The life, the love
You die to heal
The hope that starts
The broken hearts
Your trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
I’ve got another confession my friend
I’m no fool
I’m getting tired of starting again
Somewhere new
Were you born to resist or be abused?
I swear I’ll never give in
I refuse
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
Your trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Oh...
November 23rd, 2005
okay, here is my ...rant.
the vatacian has annouced no gay men will ever be allowed to become pope from now on.
wtf?
how can a pope even be "gay" to begin with? I mean, priests, brothers, cardinals, the pope... they are not allowed to have any type of sexual relations or phsycail love of anyone to begin with. so, say a priest had feelings for men ... why would it matter if he can't act upon it?
don't you think by the time you get to the level of a holy pope that relations on that level would not even be such a concern because God is their entire life ... it consumes their very being does it not?
why is this even being brought up?
I don't understand it ... its chaos. and its driving me to maddness.
WHO CARES, YOU CRAZY CATHOLICS!
NO ONE CARES!
if a pope is gay, no one is going to know anyway.
geesh.
the vatacian has annouced no gay men will ever be allowed to become pope from now on.
wtf?
how can a pope even be "gay" to begin with? I mean, priests, brothers, cardinals, the pope... they are not allowed to have any type of sexual relations or phsycail love of anyone to begin with. so, say a priest had feelings for men ... why would it matter if he can't act upon it?
don't you think by the time you get to the level of a holy pope that relations on that level would not even be such a concern because God is their entire life ... it consumes their very being does it not?
why is this even being brought up?
I don't understand it ... its chaos. and its driving me to maddness.
WHO CARES, YOU CRAZY CATHOLICS!
NO ONE CARES!
if a pope is gay, no one is going to know anyway.
geesh.
exhausted![](<a href="http://tinypic.com"><img src="http://i1.tinypic.com/ojfq7b.jpg" border="0" alt="Image hosting by TinyPic"></a>){kind=link}
I'm just putting this here so when I get home from work I can remember to ... make an ... observation about a current event that is just ... fascianted me.